Do people still use Blogger anymore? Whatever, I guess I still do and I'm still trying to process my race in Berlin 2 weeks ago so here we are. After my blood clot in the fall of 2016, I ran a 1:16:40 half marathon in May, 2017, and then ran 4 marathons over the span of a year. My pre-clot (TM) PR was 2:47 from Chicago, 2013. I wasn't able to put a good marathon together from 2014-2016, figuring out post college work/life balance and getting an abundance of health issues under control. 1:16:40 was encouraging. It told me that a marathon in the 2:40-2:45 range was possible. Sub-2:40 was not out of the question with the right training. I wanted to marathon so badly that I signed up for one a few weeks after the half. I trained specifically for the half and wanted to see what I could do off of that fitness. I ran a 2:46 with a 1:22 first half and a 1:24 second half. It was a weird race. I started too slow through 10k and then ran my next 13.1 @ sub-2:40 marathon pace, only to go a little backwards in the final 10k. It was a small town marathon with little to help distract me later in the race. I was happy but not content. I was also looking forward to the NYC Marathon in November. I would tackle that race 1 year after having my clot &, although I did not need to, I raised money for blood clot research. I put in a great summer and fall of training. I was ready to crush 2:40. It was my best build-up ever and I was feeling strong. Race day brought humidity, warmer than I would have liked temps, and some rain. I went out in 1:20-flat and faded hard in the second half. I had to stop a couple of times with some cramping and ended up with a 2:47. I was disappointed in myself. I made (probably the wrong) decision to ignore the weather and run what I thought I was ready for versus what I could have run on the day. I then went to CIM a month later because I already had friends going. Off of limited running in between, I went 2:44:01. I ran super even and knew I had more in me if I hadn't already had NYC in my legs. I then ran Boston in 2018. I ran 2:44:51 in the rain/wind/cold. It was a very strong run after putting in good training but I was left thinking, again, what could I really do on the right day. Surely that performance was worth something better. Surely I was ready for something faster before that but my PR was stuck on 2:44:01. I moved to Chicago shortly after that which made things easy preparing for the Chicago Marathon in 2018. I, again, found good fitness but race day was an absolute disaster. I ran 2:51 on a somewhat humid day. I didn't have it from the start which was strange. I found myself in the hospital a couple weeks later. I do not know if the two were related but I had to take until late January, 2019, to resume running again.
I came back with a vengeance and improved on my two year old half marathon PR off of just a little more than 3 months of training. I ran 1:16:03. It was a solid performance but I, again, did not have anywhere close to a perfect day. It was humid and downpoured. I also over-hydrated and got a side stitch halfway through the race that cost me some time. I basically ran 5:45 pace for 12.1 miles but had a 6:20ish mile 7 where I worked through the cramp. I was happy with the PR but frustrated yet again. I worked on my mile and 5k after that and ended up with a 4:47 road mile on a hot day where I front ran to a win and a 16:20 5k where I lost to someone who ran 16:07 where we ran the first 1.5 miles together and then I trailed for about 100m the rest of the race. I then started on my Berlin Marathon build-up. The plan was 15 weeks harder than I had ever gone before. I ended up with 9 weeks over 100 miles (113 peak) in the first 13 weeks. On the Monday after week 13, with two weeks to go until Berlin, I felt a sharp pain on the top of my foot. I went to a sports podiatrist, got an MRI, and found out that I had a stress reaction. It wasn't a full fracture but the race was in question. My doctor told me she basically would have shut anyone else down and that there wasn't much hope in racing but still tried to help me start the race. We did laser therapy. I didn't run but I cross trained furiously. I was put in a walking boot. After nearly two weeks off, I arrived in Berlin and tried a test run. I was still in a lot of pain but was there, got my number, and decided to give it a go. How much fitness did I lose? Was I still in the kind of shape I thought I was in? Pre-injury, I wanted 2:36-2:38. With the injury, I thought 2:40 could still be in play but wanted to be conservative and start off slower, knowing very well that I might have to drop out if the pain was too much. I did 2 x mile @ 6:00 pace a couple days before the race and it felt terrible after the time off and with the pain. It felt more like 10k pace. I ran 16 @ 5:58 pace, in a 22 miler, in training, feeling comfortable the whole way. I wasn't feeling the race to be totally honest. I was angry. I feel like I just haven't been dealt the right hand going into any goal race. I tried to block all that out and run my race. To my credit, I executed things pretty damn well.
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| (close to the finish about to go under the Brandenburg Gate) |
If my body was going to cooperate, I wanted to be 1:20-1:21 through 13.1 miles. That seemed very conservative when I was planning on 1:18 just a couple of weeks prior. It was a touch warmer and more humid than I would have liked at the start. I was able to get out pretty easily from Corral B (2:40-2:50, A was sub-2:40 runners). Everyone starts out too fast no matter what race or what distance. I knew the race was measured in kilometers so I knew going out conservatively meant 3:50-3:55 or so. I executed perfectly through the first 5k in 19:04 (2:41-flat pace). I was in pain and was assessing my chances of getting through the race with each step. Despite that weighing on me, I started to get into a groove and the kilometers started to click off a bit faster. I ran 18:44, 18:42, 18:52, for my next 3 5k's to get to 20k. I knew I was going to come through halfway under 1:20. I came through in 1:19:30, which is the fastest I have ever hit halfway in a marathon but I also felt stronger than in some of my past attempts. I thought sub-2:40 could happen. I thought 2:38 could happen. Berlin allows you to bring your own bottles so I had Maurten at 15 & 30km. I also had gels to take at 8km, 22-23km, and 35km. With the drinks, I figured I would nail my fueling. I got my bottle at 15km and felt like a pro! By 30km, things were getting harder. I hit 19:04 and 18:51 for my two 5k's from 20 to 30km. At 30km, however, I did not see where the bottles were supposed to be. I lost out on 80g of carbs and water. I held out hope that the station was moved up a little but realized I must of missed it. I could feel my body getting tight and was hoping I would just hold on for another 12k. I ate my last gel a little earlier than I would of liked and plowed on ahead. I went 19:06 from 30-35k. At that point, I was still on 2:39:32 pace. I had some time to spare to get under 2:40. I wanted it with every bone in my body. At 37-38km, however, my body had other plans. Similar to NYC, I cramped up so badly. My left hamstring seized and locked up. I came to a dead stop. I kept trying to run and walk forward but my body was in a world of pain. I took a minute and my mind went to so many places. To 2:40 going out the window. To not being able to finish. To running a bad time. To all the wasted training the last year, the last several years. To never being able to run to my training. To what could have been if I wasn't running on a nearly broken bone in my foot and had been able to run the previous two weeks. To what I could do with good weather as the rain was coming down. Eventually I got going again and tried to get to the finish line. I was forced to stop one more time. I kept drinking everything offered to me on the course.
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| (exhausted runner, exhibit 1) |
From 35-40km, with the two stops, I split a 22-flat 5k. Something great started to happen after 40k. My stride came back. I'm pretty sure I split my fastest kilometer from 41-42k. I did the math and knew I had to close really hard to come in under 2:43. I refocused on that goal, put my head down, picked some people off, and crossed the line in 2:42:49. That's a new PR by a little over a minute. I just feel like it could have been so much more. I feel like I've been ready for 2:42 since 2013. I feel like the fall of 2017 could have been sub-2:40. I feel like Boston was worth sub-2:40. I dunno, it's just tough to only take off 5 minutes in 6 years. I have big goals and dreams for the marathon. My plan is to go away from the marathon for a little while to better help me achieve those goals. If I want to say, run a sub-2:30 marathon someday, I need to run a half marathon in the 1:11-12 range. I've run 1:16 on the nose. I feel like I should be a 1:14/2:36 guy or thereabouts right now but I'm really just 1:16/2:42. My plan is to focus on shorter distances for a year and a half before returning to the marathon in the spring of 2021. That means going quite a bit of time with a 2:42 PR. I know it's probably the right call. Marathon training is challenging and you can't really PR at the 10k or half during training if you're all in on marathon pace. My plan is to run a spring half and then a fall half and honestly see how close I can get to the 1:11-1:12 range. It's ambitious and I'm just a 1:16/2:42 runner. Some would call that a bit out there but I know I have more in me. Berlin wasn't the day I envisioned but after all I went through, and gutting that race out after not running and on a stress reaction, I definitely know that's not my ceiling. That's why I run. To test my limits.
I'm still a bit down without having a result next to my name that I can look at and say that is the absolute best that I can do. Running is hard. I want to find out but it's hard getting trapped in the what if games. I can't run right now. I'm back in the boot. The plan is for four weeks completely off and if all goes well I get to run at that time. It means yet another comeback. Yet another time having to regain fitness. It's always two steps forward, 1 step (or more) backwards. Kipchoge just broke 2. The Chicago Marathon is tomorrow and the weather looks perfect. I'm longing for a 40 degree day, with no injuries, no wind, no humidity, good fluid intake, etc. I don't know if that will ever happen but I love to run. I'm going to give it another go until it stops being fun. I had fun in Berlin even through the pain. Coming back all the time takes some of that joy out of it. I'm going to try to stay positive, stay at peace with the person and runner I've become, and stick to the plan. If I never get faster at the mile to the half marathon, as a 27 year old, I don't think I'm too far away from my ceiling. I think I can get to 1:14/2:36 or so. I feel like I'm there now. I could keep training with my current footspeed and see if I can hit those times, but I'm dreaming of bigger and better. I would like to get under 1:14 before the spring of 2021. That would mean a marathon time under 2:36 is attainable. I want to see what I really can do. It's not going to be easy. I like marathon training more than speed training but I'm going to give myself a shot at really getting better at this thing. The plan is for Tokyo or Boston or a European Marathon in the spring of 2021. I want to run two big half marathon PRs before then.
